


Crystalized Mind Swap

by Hillbilly_Leprechaun



Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: F/F, F/M, Identity Swap, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-02
Updated: 2016-07-02
Packaged: 2018-07-19 14:37:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7365475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hillbilly_Leprechaun/pseuds/Hillbilly_Leprechaun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everything changes when an inator hits the kids' invention. When nobody is themselves, who can save the day?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crystalized Mind Swap

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic on this site, so fingers crossed it's liked! :)

It is a regular day in Danville. Phineas and gang are building a crystallized chamber  
functioning by pedaling wool-covered balloons. Candace is attempting to hang out with  
her friends and secretly bust her brothers simultaneously. Linda is at her cooking class  
with Charlene. Carl and the Major are arguing about soy almond lotion. Agent P is flying  
through the sky in his hover car. Roger Doofenshmirtz is speaking at town center. Heinz  
Doofenshmirtz is rushing around between attempting to console his teenage daughter and  
finish building his inator before Perry the Platypus shows. Vanessa is out of sorts  
because of "the stupidity of boys" plus the fact that she can never seem to bust her dad.  
Norm is busy making muffins in the kitchen.

The kids are flying their camouflaged-like-clouds machines, dragging magnified salt  
crystals through the air. They are creating a nearly see-through sculpture in the sky.  
Stacey, Jenny and Jeremy know what Candace is doing. Coltrane isn't paying attention to  
her and newcomer Johnny is just moping. Linda's phone is destroyed because of Candace  
and Charlene's is likewise, because of Vanessa. Carl is massaging the Major's shoulders  
with the soy lotion. Roger is speaking proudly, causing Perry to gag as he drops in on the  
mayor's brother. Vanessa is locked in her room and Norm continues to make muffins.  
Heinz Doofenshmirtz hears the trap go off but keeps working.

"Krkrkrkrkr.." Perry chatters, alerting the doctor.

"Yeah, yeah, hey, Perry." The scientist mutters nonchalantly.

This is the first thing to happen irregularly. Perry raises a nonexistent eyebrow for clarity  
but the doctor seems content on ignoring the platypus. Perry chatters again, struggling to  
get out of the trap. It is actually a worthy trap, having restrictions on all Perry's limbs,  
including his tail. Heinz keeps working.

Norm bursts into the room with a tray of muffins. "IT'S MUFFIN TIME DAD!"

"Yeah, thanks." Heinz grabs a muffin without correcting his robot.

Perry watches dumbfounded as Heinz lifts the muffin to his mouth. Heinz chews on air  
then drops the untouched muffin and screws in another bolt. Perry struggles even harder,  
fearful that Doof might have finally snapped.

"YOU DIDN'T EAT IT SIR."

"Yeah, okay." Doof nods. "I'll buy you an ostrich in the morning."

"AN OSTRICH?" Norm sounds, well, confused.

"Sure, sure." Heinz waves him off.

He screws in the last bolt and wheels his invention onto the balcony. He doesn't bother  
moving Perry. He doesn't even look at the platypus as he begins to talk in a monotonous  
voice not fit to his character.

"Behold, my swapamassinator. It, uh, lets you, eh, swap minds and I plan to use it on  
Roger and I'll be mayor. Cause I'll be in his body. And y'know rule the tri-state or  
whatever."

Perry chirrs loudly, trying to get free. Norm is staring at his 'dad' like he's fallen off the  
deep end. The door to the apartment opens and shuts. Norm is the first to talk, though he  
is definitely not as chipper as normal, while he is still loud.

"HE-llo Sis."

"Um, hey, Norm." Vanessa tosses her keys in a bowl. "Hey, Perry." The platypus nods.  
"Hey, Dad."

Heinz doesn't acknowledge her. She purses her lips and moves to Norm's side. "Hey,  
Dad." Still nothing. She walks behind Perry's trap. "Hey, Dad. Impressive trap." Her  
eyes start uncontrollably watering. She walks up to Heinz and taps on his shoulder  
incandescently. He stares at her with malice out of the corner of his eye. "Daddy?"

He shoves past her. "Go away, kid."

Perry's eyes widen in disbelief. Every time Perry's been over while Vanessa was over,  
the teen would be content in her room or listening to music, or reading headphones.  
Heinz would try to be Vanessa's pal and work everything around to that. Today, he  
seems so nonchalant. He doesn't ramble or really talk to Perry and he just brushes off his  
daughter's concern. Terrified on the inside, Perry shakes his head so his hat falls to the  
side. He chirrs loudly and dims his focus.

Heinz actually looks over. Instead of the overwhelming guilt of trapping an innocent  
animal washing over, Heinz's eyes narrow into slits. He marches over, scoops up the hat  
and pounds said hat onto Perry's head. Perry has a headache and his focus is back in  
determination. He is still stuck in the trap and the seemingly angry doctor has just  
pummeled him with his own hat. Worse, he recognized him without the hat.

Almost immediately, Vanessa starts working on freeing Perry the Platypus. Heinz notices  
but doesn't say a word or do a thing. He turns his attention back to his inator and presses  
a button. It starts to get undeniably hot in the apartment and the humidity outside grows  
thick. Heinz calibrates his inator toward Roger's podium. Vanessa knows Roger can be  
scary when confused, as he drops his facade for a while. They would be trapped on a high  
floor with an unstable man who had just transformed into the unfavorite son. The  
disowned son. The reject. He fires.

Instead of hitting Roger like it had been planned, the laser hits a crystallized compartment  
of Buford and Baljeet's grip. Shattering the crystal, the laser transforms into five. Two hit  
the crystal flown by Isabella and Gretchen. Two more hit the crystal flown by Phineas  
and Ferb. Another hits the one flown by Katie and Milly. Another broken piece hits  
Ginger and Adyson. The crystals are gone and there are somewhere between fifteen and  
twenty lasers firing off in random directions. They hit the suburbs, the park, and a few  
several places in town. Vanessa finally sets Perry free and the platypus promptly moves  
over to push the inator off the building. Instead, he freezes along with Heinz, Vanessa  
and Norm. Four lasers are aimed directly for them. Heinz scowls in hatred.

"Shit."


End file.
